Tag: geek

Why Endgame broke me

Hola everyone.

Yes, the day has finally come. I am here and I’m finally going to talk about Endgame. I know, it really took me long enough, but those of you who have seen it and have followed my blog for a while will know exactly why. I needed time to recover. But now I’m ready to let all my thoughts and emotions spill. Just a quick note at the beginning: No, I don’t think that Avengers: Endgame is the best Marvel movie ever, but before you start shouting at me, please first let me tell you why I think this way. Naturally, this means that the following paragraphs will contain a freaking HUGE amount of spoilers, so if you haven’t seen the movie yet – first of all, what are you even doing, and secondly, well freaking done not getting spoiled until now – please stop reading now. Trust me, it will definitely ruin the experience of the movie. Go and see it at the cinema (preferably in IMAX) and just enjoy the movie. Seriously.

.

So, for one last time…

.

HUGE AMOUNT OF SPOILERS FOR AVENGERS: ENDGAME COMING YOUR WAY

.

Before I actually start discussing the movie, let me quickly explain why this movie, from the day I knew it would be coming, meant so much to me. In 2009 I was sat in front of my tv at home, flicking through the channels and ended up on one particular scene, showing a guy dressed in a metal suit, flying around in the air. I decided to keep watching it and in that very moment, I started off a journey into a completely different, wonderfully fascinating universe that would continue being by my side for the next 10 years. I didn’t know it then, but the strange guy, who, back then, was a bit too full of himself, although I still thought he looked cool in the golden and red suit, would soon become my all-time favourite fictional character and my ultimate hero (besides my mum, but we’re talking about fictional stuff). I soon went from calling him Iron Man to referring to him as Tony. My Tony. I remember writing down a list of all the upcoming highlights of 2013 and proudly putting the release of Iron Man 3 right up there. That’s how much I loved the movies. And not just Tony, but also all the others (we don’t talk about Thor 1 & 2). Doctor Strange blew my mind with all its endless colours and realities, while Thor: Ragnarok had me shed tears of laughter. Civil War had me broken for the one character I loved the most, while Spiderman combined my two favourite heroes (Tony and Peter) and made me fall in love with the friendly neighbourhood Spiderman all over again. And then came Infinity War. The one movie that still is, even after Endgame, the single best movie, no, the single best cinematic experience, I’ve ever had and seen in my entire life. It is and will always be pure perfection. At least for me. No other movie has ever made my feel such a complex mix of emotions within the duration of two and a half hours. And that’s the most important part when it comes to the MCU – it makes me feel things. Over the course of those 10 years, I’ve gotten attached to certain characters, fought discussions for them, had them guide me on my own path in life. Marvel has become a part of my life, a part of me.

.

And this is why Endgame was so important to me. And also why it hurt so much. I went into the cinema, thinking that I would be walking out as the same person I walked in. But no. Endgame did something to me no other movie or tv show, basically anything fictional, has ever done to me. It broke me. And here’s why.

.

They killed him.

They really made my most feared scenario become reality and killed off the one character I loved the most. They killed Tony. My Tony. The one character that has been with me for the past ten years and now he’s just gone and I don’t know what to do. Honestly, I swear, if I hadn’t been crying so much, it would have been quiet enough in the cinema to literally hear my heart burst into a million pieces. I felt like someone had just ripped out my heart, set it on fire, jumped on it, torn it into pieces and then thrown these pieces down a cliff, just to scrape them off the ground and give them back to me with an evil grin on their face. Leni, who I watched the movie with, later told me that she could actually hear me whisper “please no. please no. I don’t want to see this. I don’t want to see this.” over and over again. I was literally begging for his life, although I knew I couldn’t do anything. I wish I could have.

.

I don’t know how long I cried for. I mean, I started to tear up as soon as we saw Clint’s family turn to dust, and Nat sacrificing herself for the soul stone had me in ugly tears as well, but that was nothing compared to my state when Tony died. I actually don’t remember most of the movie after that moment, I just know that when everyone had left the room and I was finally able to get up, I went to the toilet, locked myself in and started to cry again. I just couldn’t help myself. But there was this nice moment that happened as I was sitting there, bawling my eyes out. I could hear someone next to me crying as well and at that moment I didn’t feel alone anymore. I knew I wasn’t the only one going through this and that helped.

.

It took me about three weeks to fully recover and to go through all the stages of grief. Which I really did go through, I’m not even kidding. First came the shock, the obvious stage. And as soon as we got out of the cinema, I said: “I’ve never seen that movie, that never happened, Tony is still alive, Marvel can f* off.” Yep, that right there is denial in it’s most perfect form. And the rest was just a few cries, mixed with A LOT of anger, that’s still lurking around in the back of my head, topped with a few bits and bops of hope. But I think I’ve got it now. I mean, I still cried yesterday when RDJ posted his goodbye video of his last day on set on Instagram, but besides that I’m fine. I think.

.

To be honest, if I didn’t love Tony that much, I think I would actually be fine with his ending. But you never want someone you love to die, do you? But I get it. He’s the hero. He’s always been the hero. And he could have never fully settled down if he didn’t know that the world was a 1000000000 % safe. That’s just who he is. So, I get it. And I’m proud to be a fan of the best one. I recently read an interview in which Joe Russo answered the question of why it had to be Tony. Why he had to be the one to defeat Thanos. Here’s what he said: “Stark is the most formidable of all of them. Because of his heart.” I can’t even begin to describe how much that sentence means to me. I think that’s also why I partly love Endgame. It’s a homage to Tony. He was the one to start it all. He was the one to make it all happen. They would have never been able to even go back in time and get the stones without having him figure out time travel in the first place. It’s always been him. He has always been and will always be the best of all of them and Endgame proved that.

.

I’m just not quite sure if I wouldn’t have liked him to just be a mediocre hero who actually got to survive. But then it wouldn’t be Tony, I guess. His arc is the defining arc of the MCU and his story has always been the core of it all. He’s the heart of the MCU and I honestly have no idea what they’re going to do without him now. I mean, I’ve slightly got my hopes up for Far From Home and a Tony A.I., but after watching that video that Robert posted, I’m not so convinced anymore. I guess I just need to accept that I won’t see this man in that role ever again and that’s actually the hardest step of all of them.

.

So, that’s that about Tony and how Endgame broke my heart. But, honestly, that’s not why I’m just not such a big fan of the movie. Don’t get me wrong, the movie had some of the best moments in cinematic history, and scenes I deeply loved. It basically gave me everything I was hoping for and then crushed it all in front of my eyes. But still, it had so many good parts. I loved seeing Tony interact with Nebula, who, in my opinion, is one of the best characters of the whole movie. The scene when Tony finally gets back to earth and then goes up against Cap in that amazing monologue is one of the most empowering scenes ever. I wanted to scream at that part, no joke. I’ve always wanted Tony to call Cap out on his mistakes and he finally did it and it made me feel so alive. Because Cap just had to stand there and endure it. And he deserved it. Also, it was one of the best scenes I’ve ever seen from Robert and if the Academy doesn’t nominate him for an Oscar I’ll be knocking on their door very very soon.

.

I loved seeing Tony with his young daughter Morgan, who, I’m not going to lie, is the cutest kid ever. And I was so happy to finally see him get what he always wanted – a family. I might just have to add now that I’m still furious with the Russos and the writers McFeely and Markus for saying that giving Tony five years of perfect retirement life was enough, but I’ve been angry about that for long enough now. I’d rather focus on the fact that these were the cutest scenes of the whole movie and the fact that the “I love you 3000” line actually comes from Robert himself because his own kids say that to him, which nearly brings my heart to a burst. Isn’t that the sweetest thing ever?

.

Also, finally putting Pepper into a suit was definitely one of the best decisions they could make. Again, this all happened thanks to Robert, who told the directors that Pepper needed to become a more important character, which again proves that the MCU would never be what it is now without this amazing actor and his love for this franchise. I can just repeat myself – I really don’t know what they’re going to do without him now.

.

Besides that, despite what most people say, it made total sense to me that Nat had to sacrifice herself. She would never be the one to watch her best friend kill himself for her, so I always knew it would be her. And I liked how they made the scene turn out, them fighting over the sacrifice, it made it all that bit more dramatic. I have to admit that I like the idea of her sacrificing herself in order to prove how much she loves her Avengers family more than the thought of the writers of how Clint had to stay alive because he had a family. What a dumb thing to say. They killed Tony, who also had family, so what do they even mean?

.

And I liked that Clint got to be in the bigger picture again, as I’ve always really enjoyed the character. I still don’t quite get why they had to show him kill some Asian guys as Ronin, but oh well. I don’t know if they will show him in future movies, but I would be quite happy if they did.

.

So far about the characters I did like. Now, let’s talk about the most epic part – the end fight. Holy moly. Leni and I watched the movie in IMAX, so, without exaggerating, I was sitting there, watching that part, and I had no idea where to look. There was just so much going on. First, the holy trinity (Tony, Cap and Thor) fighting Thanos. Clint running away from the Chitauri with the gauntlet in his hand. Then Cap fighting Thanos on his own and suddenly being able to wield Mjølnir. And then him suddenly hearing “on your left”, said by Falcon, and seeing all the portals open up around him and all the dusted characters being alive again and coming to help them fight Thanos. Pepper becoming Rescue and fighting Thanos’ army alongside Tony. Tony hugging Peter after he finally came back and uttering “hold me, kid, hold me”. All the female characters teaming up to beat Thanos. Wanda basically being the baddest of them all and saying “you took everything from me” to Thanos – which also kind of describes how I’m feeling about Endgame, to be honest. Just the overall fight and being able to watch all of these different characters fighting alongside each other blew my mind. Definitely one of the best scenes I’ve ever been able to experience.

.

Overall, the production of this movie is out of this world. The dynamics, the colours, the cinematography. All the people working in the CGI apartment for Marvel should receive an award for this because they sure outdid themselves with this one. Apart from that, I absolutely love the score – a big thank you to Alan Silvestri for that one. And last but not least, the actors. RDJ (obviously), Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson, Karen Gillan, Tom Holland (who always receives the script the day they are shooting and basically improvises nearly every single scene), Josh Brolin, just to name a few. All of them brought their A-game to this movie and I’m still stunned by that. They deserve all the recognition they get and I’m so glad we got to see all of these amazing actors together in one movie. Also, let’s not forget the fantastic stunt doubles who did an incredible job as well. Basically, the whole movie is a compilation of amazing people doing their best.

.

But, as I stated at the beginning, the movie, for me, is far from being perfect. I have to admit that I had indeed set the bar very high. Infinity War had, actually. I wanted Endgame to be perfect, maybe even more than that, and, unfortunately, it couldn’t live up to that. Which would be fine, if it didn’t have obvious issues. First of all, and some people might not agree with me on that one, I hated what they did with Thor and Hulk. Thor: Ragnarok is one of the best Marvel movies ever and it made me fall in love with the two characters, whereas Endgame made a joke out of both of them. I know that Thor had to be the one character to prove that he indeed suffers, but making him fat just for laughs was cheap (the filmmakers indeed admitted that it was meant to be a joke). And what happened to Hulk? Why did he have to dab? The more they showed him, the more I started to lose respect and it made me feel so bad because I honestly love Bruce. I read a theory that Hulk could become Hulk again through his pain after hearing that Nat had died and I honestly would have loved that take so much more.

.

On the other hand, I would have also liked the ending to be a bit different. Not different as in an alternate ending – although I would do nearly anything to have Tony back. I would have just liked the movie to end on another note. Personally, I always knew that Cap would go back in time and stay there with Peggy. I even betted on that with Leni. I just knew. But I didn’t want it to be the last scene of the movie. Because it left me with a feeling that we had all just watched another Captain America movie and not an Avengers one. It shouldn’t have been just him with Peggy. The funeral should have been the end. Because it was the scene where all of them were together (slight note: did you all see Harley? I’m so happy to have him back). It would have given us the sense of togetherness and how the movie was about THEM and not just Cap and his lovey-dovey ending (frankly, I’m a bit bitter about that) (also, I won’t talk about the time travel aspect, because it still is a plot hole, but oh well). That should have been the post-credit scene and at the very end, before the lights turned on, we should have heard the sound of Tony making his very first suit in that cave from a bunch of scraps. That would have been the perfect ending for me (besides having Tony live – and no, I’ll never stop complaining about that).

.

And lastly, I also have to say that I have a slight problem with the overall story. I know that the movie was meant to be a celebration of the past ten years, which is why they had us relive Avengers again and Thor 2 and the first Guardians movie. And I loved that, I really did. But after much deliberation, I think it was kind of lazy as well. It relied way too much on the concept of fan service. And of course I am a huge fan of fan service, because, you guessed it, I am indeed a fan. But at the end of the day, I am an even bigger fan of innovation. Having us watch the battle of New York again and giving us a glance behind the scenes is fan service. Putting Doctor Strange, Spidey and Tony in one ship and having them collide with the Guardians on a planet called Titan, which none of them has ever been on, is innovation. And that’s where Endgame is different. It lacks innovation. Of course, it was nice to relive the past 22 movies, but I would have loved to see something new. Something I would remember for the rest of my life (besides the end fight and losing Tony).

.

So yeah, guys, there you go. That’s my take on Avengers: Endgame. I’m pretty sure I forgot to include a bunch of other scenes, but I think I managed to discuss my personal most important aspects. I’m sure you all have your own takes on the movie and I’m even more sure that some of you won’t agree with me at all. But maybe some of you will. Either way, I would love to hear your opinions, so please don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts and comments down below. I’m always open to a nice discussion.

.

In the end, I just have to say, that despite my feelings about the movie, I am incredibly happy to be able to experience something like this. 11 years ago absolutely nobody would have dared to dream about something like this and now we are here. A moment in time where a superhero movie could become the biggest movie of all time. How incredible is that? And personally, I’m incredibly grateful that I got to spend my time growing up with the one and only Robert Downey Jr. accompanying me on my path as the one and only Tony Stark. After losing him, I suddenly noticed how much this character really means to me and I’ll be forever grateful for being able to go on this journey with him. He’s the character I could always identify myself with the most – despite not being a billionaire and a genius myself (I wish). He was always the most relatable one. The one who wasn’t born or made a superhero, the one who wasn’t trained or calls himself a god. He’s just a human being, but the smartest one I know, with the biggest heart. And that’s why I’ve always loved him. And despite how much the movie has hurt me, I still love Marvel with all of my heart. 3000.

,

And I love you guys as well. If you’ve made it until here, thanks so much for reading all of my thoughts, you’re amazing. I dearly hope you enjoyed them. And, as always, I wish you a lovely weekend and thanks for reading. x

Winter Is Here

Hola everyone.

And welcome to another week. Can’t believe we’re already reaching the middle of February. When did that happen? Time really does fly by, doesn’t it? That’s why we need to enjoy it to its fullest. Which is something you could say I did in the past few weeks. Which is exactly what I wanna tell you all about. Today I’m gonna tell you the story of how I, despite all my beliefs, became a Game of Thrones fan.

.

Yes, I know. I’ll give you all a minute to process that and calm down again. Yes, it’s really me, Laura. I know. I can’t believe it myself. I, the person who really really REALLY disliked Game of Thrones until a few weeks ago now calls herself a fan. Life is full of surprises. And I did not only watch it, oh no. I devoured it. I binged it. I didn’t watch anything else for about three or four weeks. Which is exactly how long it took me to get through all of the seven seasons. I’ll let you do the math, but yes, that’s not a long time. And every single time I felt my mind going a bit twitchy because I was sitting at uni and just wanted to know what would happen to Jon or Daenerys in the next episode, I got this instant feeling of shock and surprise and, quite frankly, happiness.

.

But before I get into why I now really really like the series, let me first explain why I disliked it so badly. Well, I first got in contact with the show when my parents started watching it and I got see a few bits here and there. And I literally hated all of it. And that never really changed throughout the years. So, whenever someone asked me why I didn’t like the show, I told them that I thought that it was either a porno or a slasher/gore horror movie. Which was true, at least, because nobody ever seemed to come up with an argument against that. And let’s be honest, the first two seasons are indeed just a mix of those two things. So, as you can probably guess, I didn’t really enjoy watching it the first few days. That’s just not my cup of tea, you know. I love horror movies, but not that kind. But I thought I should just give it a chance. There had to be a reason for the extreme hype around it. And I wanted to know that exact reason. It was a bit like Lord of the Rings for me. I never liked it until I saw the ending of the second Hobbit movie by accident on TV and couldn’t stop myself from falling in love with the whole story. And that was exactly what I hoped would happen with Game of Thrones. I wanted to be wrong. I wanted to like it.

.

Which I then did, after I let myself fall into it. The more episodes I watched, the more I enjoyed it. And maybe that’s just my opinion, but for me the show gets better with every single season. Compared to the last two, the first two seasons really are utter crap (my favorite two episodes are the last two of season 6; so epic, I can’t even describe it). Sorry, not sorry. And I can’t be the only one to notice that they literally got rid of all the crappy stuff. Of course nudity is still a big thing and it wouldn’t be GOT if not at least one person got killed in every single episode, but none of that is crappy in any way. They really topped up on the quality and I’m so utterly thankful for that. The more constructed the stories got and the more characters started to grow and change, the more I got to love the show. I caught myself cursing at different characters, even clapping and cheering when one of my favorite characters killed off one of my most hated ones. I got so intrigued by the story, I felt like a part of it myself. I still do, actually. And it’s all very fresh, as I just finished the series last week.

.

I know that the last season is supposed to be released in the middle of April or something like that, which I’m super excited for. I don’t wanna spoil anything, but I honestly have no idea how any of them want to win the real war. I mean, whoever dies, they’re just going to have to kill them again. And from what I’ve seen online so far, I’m not the only one who thinks the war is literally impossible to win. Which is exactly why I’m so excited to see how it’s gonna end. Very very hyped up, honestly.

.

So yeah, there you go guys. That’s how I became a fan of Game of Thrones and again learned you shouldn’t judge a movie or a series by a few minutes. But what do you think about the show, guys? Do you like it? Let me know your thoughts down below. And until then I hope you enjoy this post and wish you all a nice week. And, as always, thanks so much for reading. x

Far From Home

Hola everyone.

Yes. The Marvel fans among you read correctly. The day has come. The day I finally set another part of my Marvel fangirl free. And how I’ve been waiting for this, oh yes. So, today guys, I’d like to discuss with you the one and only Spiderman: Far From Home trailer that not only blew me away but also confused the hell out of me. So many questions, so many possibilities. Let’s go.

.

Okay, so first of all, here’s my little warning to all of you who haven’t seen Infinity War so far (what are you even doing with your life?): this post will contain A HUGE FREAKING MASS OF SPOILERS so please continue reading at your own risk. Also, from this point on, I’m kind of presuming that you’ve all seen the movie and are kind of familiar with all the possible theories for Endgame and how our heroes will fight the dust (ba dum tsss). Mostly because going through all of them would take way too long, an eternity even, so if you aren’t part of the matter, here’s a link to my favorite post-Infinity War video by New Rockstars, that goes through all the possible ideas for Endgame – click me.

.

And now that’s off the table, let’s get to the most important part – the trailer. Here it is, for all of you who haven’t seen it or just want to watch it again, which I would totally understand, I watched it three times in a row:

.

Like I said, the trailer is damn good, let’s make that clear, but also wHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON????? Why is nobody sad? Shouldn’t they all be super depressed because half of the population recently vanished due to Thanos’ snap? Or because most of our heroes died? And why is everyone alive? Peter? Fury? And why is Happy happily flirting with Aunt May? Shouldn’t he be super sad because his boss, the man, the legend, the one and only Tony Stark aka Iron Man is either gone or still floating around in space? Which of course will never happen, because Tony is sacred and must be protected at all costs. Also, if they kill him, I’m gonna cry and sue someone. I don’t know who, but I’ll find someone. But besides that, there just has to be something wrong here. Can you smell it, guys? The secrecy and confusion in the air? I can. It’s lingering around like a perfume.

.

Okay, so, Spidey is alive. As we know from Kevin Feige and Amy Pascal, the movie is set literally a few minutes after the story of Endgame comes to an end and according to Feige “it was purposefully done like this. Like how the events of Captain America: Civil War impacted Peter as he was dropped off by Tony and expected to go back to continue his sophomore year, how the hell are the events of Infinity War and Endgame going to affect him as he, yes, goes back to his junior year?” But as we can see in the trailer, Peter is just doing fine, actually he’s acting like nothing ever happened. I mean, yes, he refuses to take his original Spidey-suite with him on his trip to Europe, so he can focus more on flirting with MJ (so cute), but that doesn’t mean much, even less when we see that May packs it for him at the end. Which again brings me to another question – where is the Iron-Spider suite? It would’ve certainly replaced the OG suite by now, I’m sure. So, again, what the hell is going on?

.

Since the trailer has been released, I’ve buried my head in YouTube and the mass of breakdown and theory videos for Endgame and Far From Home. And so far, I’ve heard enough different theories to fill a few posts with them, but for me, there are only two real possibilities:

Either the movie is set in another reality, like we’ve already seen in the new Spiderman: Into The Spider-Verse movie (which was mind-blowing, by the way), or the Avengers can go back in time in Endgame and make it so that Infinity War never happened, which would then explain why the Iron Spider suite isn’t in the trailer and why everyone is still alive and definitely not completely traumatized.

.

Of course, the second theory would also mean, that by releasing the Spiderman trailer, Marvel and Sony literally spoiled their own biggest cinematic event to date, which is Endgame, obviously. Which kind of annoys the frick out of me. I mean, I knew that there would be another Spidey movie and another Black Panther and another Guardians movie and so on, but still. As much as it hurt, I loved the ending of Infinity War. I loved how dark it had all suddenly become and how you could feel the hopelessness in the room. I loved not knowing who would actually survive and why and how. I loved the suspense. But now it’s just out there, the definite sign that Endgame will have the happiest ending ever and that everyone will survive and hippy-dippy, oh how aren’t we all happy.

.

And I don’t want that. I refuse to except it, to be honest. That’s why I’m currently hoping for the different reality explanation to be a thing. Or that Feige and Pascal simply lied to all our faces and that Far From Home is actually set right before Infinity War, which, honestly, would make the most sense, but oh well. Right now, we’ve got less than 96 days to wait until Endgame finally comes into the cinema and all of our questions will finally be answered. I honestly can’t wait. I’m not even exaggerating, I seriously have a countdown on my phone. Sorry, not sorry. That’s true dedication right there.

.

So yeah, there you go, my fellow Marvel fans and fellow readers. Those are all of my thoughts about the Spiderman: Far From Home trailer and what it could mean for Endgame and our favorite superheroes in a nutshell. As I said, I deeply love the trailer, but my head is literally stuffed with so many questions. And I honestly can’t wait for them to be finally answered. But what about you? Do you agree with my ideas or do you have other theories? Please don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts down below, I’d be so happy to read them all. And yeah, I hope you enjoyed this little post and that you’re all doing well. And, as always, I wish you all a nice week and thanks for reading. x

Welcome back home

Hola everyone.

You guys aren’t gonna believe how long I’ve been waiting to finally be able to write this special post right here. Yes, this one. The one you’ve just decided to read. Speaking of that – hey there, thanks for checking by. Buckle up, it’s gonna get magical today.

.

So, as most of you, who have been following me for quite a while, will know, I am a huge Potterhead. If you’ve ever imagined the typical Harry Potter fan, then that’s pretty much me. I’ve grown up watching the movies, always being the same age as Harry, having this magical boy as my first crush, dreaming about going to Hogwarts and loathing Snape until the last two movies. I know which house I am – Ravenclaw, obviously -, I’ve read or more like let myself fall into all of the books and watched the movies way too many times. I’m one of those people who call Hogwarts their home (hence the title of this post), plainly because it feels like home whenever I see it. It’s a part of me, a part of my childhood, a part of my youth and thanks to the Fantastic Beasts series it has now become a part of my adulthood too. Which is also exactly what I want to talk about today. Because this Ravenclaw girl right here finally got to watch The Crimes of Grindelwald and holy moly, I’m still shook. I nearly fell off my broomstick while watching it, no joke.

.

But, before I get into this – Muggles and fellow wizards and witches, please beware, from this moment on there will be crucial spoilers floating around in this post. If you have already had the chance to see the movie, I’d love to hear your opinions and start a discussion in the comment section, but for every magical reader right here that hasn’t, please only move on with caution and at your own risk. Though this post will not start moving by itself like the stairs in Hogwarts, the spoilers will indeed take most of the fun out of watching the movie afterwards. I’ve now done my duty as a good Potterhead and warned you all. So, off we go.

.

First of all, like every single Harry Potter / Wizarding World movie, Crimes of Grindelwald starts off with the Warner Brothers logo floating towards you, surrounded by dark fog, while the beginning of Hedwig’s theme is playing in the background. These 3 seconds, that short melody we all know so well, was all I needed to get into the movie. And I think it’s all any Potterhead really needs. I got chills and from that moment on I was captivated by the story. I might have to mention that I watched it at the BFI IMAX in London (biggest screen in the UK, heyooo), hence the whole being captivated part, but honestly, from that moment on I just forgot everything around me. It was just me and the movie. Me and my home.

.

I’m not gonna talk about the whole story of the movie, because first of all, we all pretty much know it, don’t we, and second, if I did that, we would still be sitting here on our brooms until tomorrow. Might not want to miss the next Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson because of that, right? So, I’m just gonna shed some light upon the parts that I loved the most and that plainly stood out for me and made me love the movie. Lumos.

.

Where should I begin? Maybe at the most important one – the story. In my opinion, this movie was made for fans and Potterheads. The ones who watched every single movie before Crimes of Grindelwald, the ones who read the books and know the stories. Because if you haven’t, you won’t get anything. You could be the best wizard or witch in the world, heck, you could even be smarter than the one and only Hermoine Granger and you would still not get a thing if you haven’t read the books. Because if this movie doesn’t do one thing, then it’s telling you what’s going on and what Grindelwald is actually planning on doing. You wouldn’t know that he hates Muggles (sorry, guys) and that he thinks wizards and witches, pure bloods especially, are way better than them. What he wants is a wizarding domination and it won’t be easy to stop him from achieving that. Which is also why Dumbledore parted ways with him once he noticed how radical his so dearly loved Gellert had become. Lets just hope that he can break the blood pact they made and will be able to fight him sooner or later. And while I know all of this because of the fan I am, other people might not do. You just have to know to know.

.

And this leads me to all the questions I now have stuck in my head and of course the mind-blowing ending and the twist that left me shaking long after the credits had rolled down. I told you I nearly fell off my broom. What happens to Queenie? Why didn’t she manage to understand that Grindelwald doesn’t care about Muggles at all and would gladly kill Jacob if he could? I’m actually creating this theory now that we will have a showdown between them in the future where Grindelwald will probably kill Jacob and Queenie will finally understand. My heart is already breaking for them.

.

And what will happen to Nagini? She doesn’t seem like a bad person, so how will she end up being Voldemort’s most treasured Horcrux? And when will Newt and Tina finally get together? These two are literally so in love, I could see sparks flying around me during their scenes. And those weren’t coming from my wand, I promise. Also, Newt is literally the cutest character ever and I’m now making the decision to say that I’m literally him and he’s me. Quirky, weird, smart, awkward and with a heart that is way too big for all the darkness in the world – “You never met a monster you couldn’t love”. I’m already so excited to see how his story is going to continue. I know many people criticized that the focus shifted from him in the second movie, but I actually like that. It’s called Fantastic Beasts and not Newt Scamander for a reason.

.

The only thing that is for sure now is that there will be a focus on Dumbledore and his old nemesis Grindelwald because, as we witches, wizards and well-informed Muggles all know, there will be a big battle between them, which Dumbledore will win, leaving him with the famous Elder Wand, only the most powerful wand in the wizarding world. But hold your on to your brooms, owls, cats, toads or whatever creature you’re about to set free right now – as we also all know, at the end of the literal end, Harry destroyed the wand. Nobody should ever have so much power in his/her hands, right?

.

But, speaking of Dumbledore – and we’ve now reached the big twist and also the end of the movie – WHO IN THE NAME OF MERLIN IS AURELIUS DUMBLEDORE? And since when was it okay to just decide that poor Credence was the brother of Albus? And who is that Phoenix he has with him? It’s Fawkes, isn’t it? So many questions and no book in the whole Hogwarts library can give us an answer, not even the ones in the restricted section. But, here’s my theory: Grindelwald totally lied to him and Credence isn’t a Dumbledore. And there will be a scene in the future movies where Credence, or now Aurelius, and Dumbledore will be fighting each other, just to see that Fawkes will come for Dumbledore’s help. It is him who decides who is a true Dumbledore, just like Albus said in the movie: the Phoenix comes to help only a true Dumbledore in great need. But that is just my theory. I’ve also read another one on how Credence is actually Ariana, Dumbledore’s younger sister, who died in a battle between Dumbledore, Grindelwald and Aberforth Dumbledore. At least everyone thought she was dead until now. As it is believed that she was also a Obscurial, just like Credence, it could be that she never truly died, but that her Obscurus moved on to another host, which now could be Credence himself, which would indeed make him the brother of Dumbledore. Is this as exciting to you as it is to me? Even my wand is spraying sparks now.

.

So yeah, there we have it. So many open questions and still three movies (or even more) to go. Honestly, I know so many people didn’t enjoy this movie as much as the first one, but I loved it. The actors are amazing, Johnny Depp is beyond magical as Grindelwald and Jude Law just guaranteed Dumbledore the title as the hottest professor at Hogwarts. Watch out, witches and wizards. I’m utterly in love with the score – as with all the Wizarding World movies -, which I’m funnily enough listening to right now. And oh my god, the imagery. So so good. Like I said, I felt like I was in the movie. There is a scene where get a glimpse of the different universes and areas Newt created for his beasts and creatures and holy Merlin, to say it was magical would be such an understatement. I now want to own a Bowtruckle. Is it allowed to own two pets/magical creatures at Hogwarts? I hope so.

.

And last but not least, the one scene that really melted my heart away and probably my favourite scene in the whole movie – the scene when they showed Hogwarts for the very first time with the beloved theme playing in the background. I suddenly felt like I was coming home again, after all these years since the last HP movie ended. And yes, I had tears in my eyes and I’m not afraid to say it. Hogwarts is and will always be my home – as it will to every single wizard and witch out there. It will always be there to welcome us all home.

.

So, there you go, guys. These are pretty much all my thoughts about those magical two hours I got to spend at my even more magical home again. I know this movie is kind of polarizing right now, but I’d still love to hear all your opinions. As always, I hope you enjoyed this post and wish you all an amazing rest of the week. And, of course, thanks for reading. Nox. x

This is Trench

Hola everyone.

Looks like we’ve come to another Friday, huh? How has your week been? I hope it’s been great. I’m honestly really looking forward to the weekend. And believe it or not, but while I’m writing this, I’m actually sat outside, at the beach. The weather has been close to perfect the past days and it kind of feels like the summer is having a little comeback here in Brighton. And oh yes, I’m more than loving this.

.

But besides the weekend, there’s something special that I’m even more looking forward to. The music lovers among you, who’ve read the title of this post, will probably already know what I’m about to talk to you guys about. Yes, I have the absolute honor of discussing the hot and new album Trench by the one and only Twenty One Pilots. God, I can’t even begin to tell you how long I’ve been waiting to finally say this. Long. But as the clock struck 12 tonight, the world was blessed with this new album. And I’m not just saying this because I’m a huge fan of Tyler and Josh and their amazing music. No. I’m saying this because those 14 songs on that album are freaking masterpieces. The whole album is a masterpiece. Welcome to Trench.

.

So, let’s start right at the beginning. Trench is the fifth album by Tyler Joseph and Josh Dun, better known as the band Twenty One Pilots. To be honest, when I heard that they were finally releasing a new album, after their one year long hiatus, I went nuts. You know, TOP aren’t just a band. They are special. Like really special. I’m just gonna go and say that I do know and listen to a lot of bands from different genres. But TOP are on another level, their music isn’t like anything I’ve ever heard before. A statement that became even truer when I heard their very first single Jumpsuit, then Nico and the Niners, Levitate and My Blood. And even more when I got to understand the meaning behind all of these songs. If you want to check out my review of them, where I explain the whole story of Dema and Clancy and what’s it all got to do with a jumpsuit, please click here.

.

Personally, after listening to those four songs and now the album, I’d say that we’ve all just got to witness TOP moving on to another level and another era. Not just because of the story, but also from the musical point of view. Because on the one hand, Trench gives us the typical sound of TOP that we all love so much, but on the other hand it’s a complete change and surprise. It’s still schizophrenia pop – yep, that’s their own genre, created just for them – but also very different. It’s a total rollercoaster, from start to finish. Genres change within the songs and between them. The rhythms seem very soulful, sometimes even moving towards RnB. There are breathtaking rap parts, followed by tear-jerking violin lines and lyrics that tell you nothing but the truth if you just listen to them closely. That’s what I’ve always loved about TOP and Tyler’s writing – he doesn’t hide anything, he just doesn’t make it too obvious.

.

But what exactly is Trench? Well, that’s a question that’s not easy to answer – like with most things when it comes to TOP and their music. After researching for hours and hours and listening to and reading the lyrics, I’d say that Trench is far more than just a story about an imaginary city called Dema and a trapped guy called Clancy. At the end, the album is about Tyler and Tyler only. About his ongoing fight with depression and anxiety (Morph), about suicidal thoughts (Chlorine, Cut My Lip), about the death of his grandfather (Legend), his love for his wife Jenna (Smithereens), his struggles as an artist and writer (Pet Cheetah) and about his relationship with the clique, their fanbase (The Hype, Leave the City). Once you look over those mostly cryptic lyrics and acknowledge the deeper meaning of them all, this album becomes a really personal one. This is also why while listening to it for the very first time, I didn’t know what to do with myself as soon as it ended. I had so many different emotions trapped inside me. I felt happy and sad, broken and mended, conflicted and ecstatic. And there were still tears glistening in my eyes, both happy and sad ones. And even after all these hours that have passed since, I still can’t fully get my head around it. It’s just too much. But in the best way ever.

.

Looking at the songs themselves, I kind of feel it’s really hard to split them from another. They just fit so perfectly and carry the story of the album like a red thread, that it becomes especially impossible to chose a few favorites. I can just tell you which songs had the biggest impact on me during the very first listen: Jumpsuit, My Blood, Neon Gravestones, Bandito, Legend and Leave The City. Some of these got me because of the lyrics, some due to the huge surprise of musical changes. But all of them are amazing. As are the rest, of course.

.

I would actually love to discuss every single song with you guys, especially as I literally googled and kind of analyzed every single one, but that would turn this post into a never ending one. Due to this, I’d just like to stick to most of the songs that I stated above and kind of go through all of their meanings.

.

Jumpsuit

I’ll never forget the very first time I listened to this and watched the video for it. It blew me away. As some of you may know and also as I’ve mentioned right at the beginning of this post, I’ve already analyzed this one, so please click here to find out more about the mind-blowing story behind this song and its followers.

.

.

Neon Gravestones

This is the one song that actually struck me because of how true and direct the lyrics are. The song starts off with a calm piano rhythm and then goes into the more upbeat drums by Josh, followed by an amazing rap by Tyler about suicide and how society nowadays glorifies those who end their lives. He especially addresses artists who end up being never forgotten because they ended their lives at the peak of their career. They are the ones who have their names in neon lights, which then become neon gravestones, once they die. Tyler then continues talking about his own death (“I could go out with a bang”), and that he doesn’t want us to remember him because of his death, but because of his life. The song then both peaks and ends with a powerful, rhythmic rap about how we should rather glorify life and celebrate those who spent their time living it, for example grandparents (this part especially gets a far greater meaning once you get to Legend and find out what’s it about).

.

.

Bandito

Do you know this feeling when you listen to a song and you never want it to stop? Ever? Because that’s what happened to me while listening to this. Bandito starts off with a distant beat that kind of resembles the noise of a heart rate monitor. Later on, during the chorus, the rhythm moves up a bit while still retaining the slowness of the beginning. And then Sahlo Folina comes. Those are the two words that act as a guide that moves you towards the second, more upbeat half of the song. What makes this song stand out for me are those exact parts when Tyler creates his own choir by singing Sahlo Folina over and over again, while the drums in the background become faster and faster and draw you into them. I couldn’t help myself but feel my heart beat faster with every second that went by. But what’s the meaning of the song? Honestly, yes, the lyrics are indeed as cryptic as you would think, but as always the clique is better than the whole FBI team out there. From what I could find the song actually is about Tyler and Josh and their lives between the Blurryface era and the Trench era. But even more so, the song is about Tyler being trapped in Dema and creating Trench to feel some sort of control. It’s about his creative life, which also connects to the translation of Sahlo Folina that I found on Reddit:

“In Bandito the line “Sahlo Folina” appears several times. I’ve seen several people think this is something backwards, but it actually has its own meaning. “Sahlo” means to enable in Somali. Folina is a name and according to a name website I found, it means this: “Your name of Folina has made you happiest when you are expressing in some creative, artistic way, and not conforming to strict routine”. So “Sahlo Folina” means to enable expressive creations. This makes a lot of sense considering the next verse is all about his ability to create the world of Trench.“

.

 

 

 

 

 

.

Legend

Don’t be surprised, but this is actually the only song on the album besides Smithereens that really has a happy sound to it. It has got it all – a light beat, a dreamy ukulele in the background and Tyler’s raw voice. Naturally, you would expect to be happy while listening to this, right? But nope. Because once you listen to the lyrics, you can say straight up bye to your makeup (if it’s still intact), because here they come, the tears. For me, this song is the saddest one. I mean, most of them have a deep, sad meaning to them, but Legend literally crushed my heart. Because this one is about Tyler’s grandfather and his death. We get to hear the story of how he got Alzheimer and how Tyler couldn’t really cope with it. And how he got to hear the beginning of the song, but not the end, because it took too long. And how his niece will never get to meet him. While listening to the song, I kind of felt like I was a part of Tyler’s life. And honestly, I just wanted to give him a hug.

.

.

Leave The City

This is the last song of the album and for me, also the perfect finale. And while listening to it, you can actually feel Tyler and Josh thinking the same. The song isn’t the last song just because. It has to be there. Not just because it’s a musical masterpiece, with extremely soft vocals and a slow beat that wraps itself around you like a blanket. It’s there because of its meaning. The city, Dema, isn’t just a city, but represents Tyler’s anxieties and depression. As we know from songs like Jumpsuit and Nico and the Niners, Clancy aka Tyler is fighting to break out of the city, he wants to leave it. And this is the point this song describes. Tyler is finally coming to terms with his mental health problems and knows that he will be strong enough to overcome them at some part of his life, but for now, he wants to focus on staying alive. It is once again an ode to the fans, the faces facing him, as he stays in this safe space that is Trench, together with them, and although he’s far from home he’s not alone. This thought is underlined at the very end of the song, which finishes with the lyrics “they know what I mean” (they = the clique) and also the same chord as the one in Truce. Overall, it feels like one of the most dedicated and emotional songs of the album, that resonates with you long after it’s over.

.

.

For me, those very meanings turn Trench into such a special album. When I heard that TOP were making a new album, I knew we would get something new, but I for sure wasn’t expecting this. And I can’t even begin to tell you how proud I am of these two guys. It isn’t just the breathtakingly amazing production (well done Tyler and Paul Meany) or the astonishing lyrics, it’s the overall package. In the words of my mum, this album doesn’t just feel like an album, it feels like a book, like a story. And yes, it is a story. It’s the story of Tyler and Josh and the clique altogether. Ultimately, Trench isn’t a city or a place, it’s us. We are Trench. We are Twenty One Pilots.

So guys, there you go. I know this has ended in being quite a lengthy post, but honestly, I could’ve said so much more. I just really wanted to share it all with you guys, even more because this band and the album mean quite a lot to me. And I really, really hope that you enjoy this album too and of course this post. I will leave the spotify link down below, so you can have a listen for yourself. As always, please don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts down below, please do tell me what you think about it. And until then I wish you all an amazing weekend and hope you’re all doing alright. And, of course, thanks for reading. x

.

News News News

Hola everyone.

I hope you’re all doing good. Holy moly, I have so much to tell you, I don’t even know where to start. So, I think I’ll just start with the most exciting part – the fact that Avengers Infinity War is finally out and that I already saw it the day it came out and that it freaking blew me away.

.

So yeah, as you can see, it indeed was an experience. I just don’t know whether I enjoyed or just endured it. First of all I have to say that I waited for this movie to come out for months, seriously. Me and my friend hyped each other up every single day just to make the wait a little less painful. And then the day finally came. We had already bought the tickets one month prior to the screening and of course, it was completely sold out. We chose to watch it in IMAX as this is literally the format the movie was made for. And that’s true guys. I’ve never seen such a phenomenal quality. I mean, the movie mostly plays in space, somewhere on crazy, fascinating planets and there’s literally a racoon, Rocket, and everything still looks so real. This movie really is the peak of the Marvel movies, no joke. It doesn’t get more epic than that. At least when it comes to the movie itself.

.

Looking at the story and what happens throughout the movie, I’m not quite sure if I enjoyed those two and a half hours. It was more like watching your fan world fall apart. But I’ll of course keep all the information for me, Thanos demands my silence. But I can just tell you, that the movie seriously is something else. And, another unpopular opinion, I think that Thanos is a good villain. The best, to be honest. Because he doesn’t act out of pure joy or fun. He really thinks that what he’s doing is for a greater good and he truly believes in it. And I mean, he’s pretty much a total idiot, but at some point during the movie I really understood him. I understood the meaning of his doing. I mean, I don’t like what he’s doing or has done, but I get it. And that’s all I’m going to say for now. But please guys, go and watch this movie. It’s freaking fantastic and I love this whole universe with all of my heart.

.

Okay, so, that was that part. It probably won’t surprise you that I watched another movie in the last week, besides Infinity War. Another amazing movie called Stronger. Here’s a little description I found on Rotten Tomatoes:

STRONGER is the inspirational and heroic true-life story of Jeff Bauman (Jake Gyllenhaal), the man whose iconic photo from the 2013 Boston Marathon bombing captured the hearts of the world.

.

So yeah, that pretty much says it all. For me, the movie was a whole different experience. It made me sad and happy and angry all at once. And I’m not sure whether that was intended or not, but the movie really made me think. About society and the USA. I mean, this guy lost both of his legs and the world around him acts like he’s a hero and nobody sees behind that and notices that Jeff is falling into a dark hole, right into depression. At some point he doesn’t even care if he dies and all his mum and the rest of his family is interested in is when he’s finally going to do that interview with Oprah. I mean, how superficial and stupid is that? But that’s society and it’s so so sad. I can really just recommend this one to any of you who are interested in movies like this one. It’s really really good. And Jake Gyllenhaal is freaking fantastic, please finally give this guy his Oscar.

.

And last but not least, here are the most important music news of the past week. Nothing But Thieves have released two new cover songs to celebrate record store day. And holy moly guys, I was literally speechless when I listened to them, especially their cover of Crazy be Cee Lo Green. You all probably know the original version, it’s a classic, but I have to say, I honestly can’t stand it. I really can’t. But it seems like NBT made it their mission to change that. And god, I would’ve never thought that it was possible, but they seriously made it possible. I couldn’t believe my ears when I first listened to it. It’s basically one of the most epic songs I’ve ever heard and I want it to be the end credits song for Infinity War. God, that would be so amazing. And their other cover is freaking awesome too. I just love Conor’s voice so much. What an amazing band, wow. But hey, hear for yourself.

.

.

So yeah guys, there you are. Those are all the news I have for you, at least the most important ones. I hope you enjoy them. Oh, and please don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts and comments down below. And yeah, again, I hope you’re all doing good and wish you an amazing week. And, as always, thanks for reading. x