lgbt – that lemon life

About Ray

Hola everyone.

I know it’s late. Very late, to be honest. But I didn’t have any time to write today, it was horrible. And after work I had to go christmas presents shopping and then I had to make myself some food and now I’m here. Anyways, I just wanna apologize for being so late.

I know you all probably expect a post about my weekend with my mum, but I thought I’d postpone that to Friday and tell you about a certain part of our time. To be exact, the day we went to the cinema and watched one of the most special and beautiful movies I’ve ever seen. And as you can all see at the title, I’m talking about the masterpiece “About Ray”.

Let me first tell you what the movie is all about. About Ray is about a girl or boy, who feels like she’s / he’s born in the wrong body. Since she was just four years old, Ramona felt like something about her just didn’t feel right. Fast forward to Ray, now 16 years old and desperate to start the gender transition. But exactly that, his age, is the problem. It means that he needs his family to be okay with loosing their daughter/granddaughter. Not to mention that his grandma still thinks that Ray should just be gay.

I guess you guys can already sense the drama and all the emotions. And I can tell you, there A LOT of emotions. Beginning with Ray, who just wants a normal life, a normal family. Then his mother, who never thought that she would loose Ramona so fast. And Rays grandma Dodo and her girlfriend Honey, who even live all under one roof. Oh and let’s not forget his dad, who left when he was just a little baby and now has to sign one of the most important papers of Rays life.

If you’re asking yourself, yes, I cried. Many times. And I had to stop myself, for real. The movie gave me such an urge to fully cry, the loud, sobbing, heartbreaking type of cry. And I think mum did too.

Apart from the unique and amazing story, the movie is turned into something perfect by the fascinating camera work – it’s actually more like some kind of art, so damn amazing – and of course the breathtaking actors. Elle Fanning is so real in her role as Ray and Naomi Watts as the mother is just mind-blowing. Mum said that she could really feel how hard she tried to let her daughter go and welcome her son. It was kinda heartbreaking, to be honest. Because of both sides, Rays and his mums. Oh and probably too because I watched it with my mum and this movie is all about mothers and daughters/sons.

I asked my mum later on if she would accept it if I told her that I felt like I lived a lie and wanted to change my gender completely. She said yes. And I am thankful for that. Because it is for sure a hard thing to say, even if it’s just hypothetically.

All in all, the movie About Ray was everything I expected it to be and so much more. I loved every second of it, even when it broke my heart. I think that’s the kind of story and movie everyone should get to know and see. Because it’s such an important and recent topic. So guys, I can really just recommend this movie to all of you. If you have the chance, please go and watch it. Please. And if any of you have seen it, what do you think about it? Did you like it as much as me? Tell me. And until then, sorry again for being so late, I hope you still enjoyed this post and, as always, thanks for reading. x

Huge haul

Hola everyone.

The day has finally come. I know I promised to post this already weeks ago but somehow I never got the time to finally do it, but know I did. Hallelujah.

So as you know I was in England for a week with my mum in August – Brighton and Reading – and then I visited my friend Mati in Croatia. And of course I had to go shopping, how couldn’t I? The shopping list started with some clothing pieces and went on and on until it ended with books and some special accessories. So I would like to show my precious purchases to all of you guys. Enjoy.

Clothes

Okay, actually it’s more like just tops, precisely one t-shirt – the most important piece of the whole haul – and four sweaters. But hey, autumn has already arrived and winter is coming and I have to be prepared.

Right now I’m completely obsessed with the sweaters they sell at Pull and Bear. They are just so comfy and big. The perfect size for being a nice oversize sweater I want to stay in forever. And it fits perfectly and looks just perfect. And besides that they all have some cool embroidered messages on them which make them even more amazing. The first one I bought was in Brighton. I just had to. Mostly because of it’s writing that says “Nobody cares if you don’t go to the party”, which is just so damn relatable and true. I’ve always been that one person that doesn’t go to parties, even though all the others did and called me boring. Because I simply didn’t care t all. That’s why the sweater is a perfect match for me. It emphasizes my lifestyle and the person I am.

The second one I bought was in Zagreb. It’s exactly the same one as the first one, just in a green color and with the Harry Potter related writing saying “I’m busy making a potion”. And let’s be honest, everything that’s Harry Potter related is just pure awesomeness. On the same day I also bought my really special rainbow sweater. I j´saw that one at Pull and Bear and just wanted it to be mine. Not just because it looks freaking amazing, but also because it’s my way of telling the world that I support the LGBT+ community. Most people will just look at me wearing it and see a cool rainbow sweater, but for me it’s my kind of support. And I love that.

The last sweater I bought is some kind of flattery poof black crop top volant type of thing. I bought it at Zara in Reading. Actually I just wanted to try it on and see how it looks but then I stayed it in the whole time when my mum was trying on other things. And that pretty much meant that I would keep it. That’s my thing. If I try something on and keep it on until I have to leave the changing rooms, it’s practically mine. There’s no other way out. And that was the case with this top.

And now the most important piece. My precious. You know that I love Fall Out Boy. And I finally got to see them live at Reading festival. And you know that I love band merch. I always buy one t-shirt whenever I’m attending a concert. And you probably guessed it by now – of course I had to buy a FOB t-shirt. And it’s seriously one of the most valuable pieces of clothing in my whole wardrobe. Because it has such a huge meaning for me. And besides that it just looks freaking cool. I mean, look it at. They band is cool, the shirt is cool, everything about this is unbelievably cool and amazing and perfect. And I love it. With all of my heart.

Other stuff

Now that we all know that clothes are not the real thing on their own, of course I had to buy some other stuff. The first thing on my list were books. I’ve been obsessed with reading good books lately, so I flew over to England with my list of books I wanted to buy and thankfully I did get all of them.

I bought:

This Modern Love by Will Darbyshire
When We Collided by Emery Lord
Everything Everything by Nicola Yoon
The Potion Diaries by Amy Alward
Harry Potter And The Cursed Child by J. K. Rowling

I read the Harry Potter one right after we bought it, I just had to. And by the way, it’s amazing. And currently I’m reading When We Collided which is also really really awesome. I can highly recommend it. And all the others too, of course.

Besides that we also bought some other things. When mum and me were strolling around in town in Brighton we walked past a painting pottery cafe which I recognized from one of Marzias blogs (Pewdiepies girlfriend). So of course we had to walk in and the next day we went back to actually paint some pottery. I chose to paint a heart, write Brighton on it and paint some flowers and other stuff on it so it would look nice. And I have to say I really enjoyed it, I loved it to be honest. It was so relaxing and it reminded me of how much I love art and painting. And on the last day which was also the next one I got my finished heart back, which was supercool and so nice of them because I told them that we would leave on this day so they finished it extra fast for me. The heart is now hanging on my wall and I look at it and it places a smile of my face every time.

And when we were at Reading festival I also bought some badges for my bags and other things. That’s like another one of my traditions, I started it when we attended Sziget festival last year. And now even my mum has a badge on her bag. Our stuff is like a display for all the experiences we’ve made. Oh and we also bought three sings, one for mums office, one for our whole family and one for my room. Going shopping in Brighton is really amazing and fascinating, because there are so many vintage shops and little shops that sell stuff you’d never get in conventional stores. And I really love that.

So, there you go. Those are the things I bought in the past two months, some in the UK, some in Croatia. But all of them are amazing and totally lovely. If any of you want to chat about shopping or anything else, I’m here. And until then, I hope you enjoy this post and, as always, thanks for reading. x

Girls talk (kinda?)

Hola everyone.

So, I guess today will be some kind of different topic and I’ll try to be 100 % honest with you because honestly, we’re all the same so.

You can probably imagine that I have no idea how it feels to be a boy, but I certainly know how it feels to be a girl growing up in this crazy world. And I can tell you, there are a lot of struggles.

Let’s start with my favorite topic (sarcasm), the week of hell. Or strawberry week or whatever you want to call it, because for me, as already mentioned, it’s the week of hell and I hate it. To death. Forever and always. Let’s be honest, why do girls have to go through that? It makes no sense at all. It hurts like hell. Makes you feel completely uncomfortable. For me, it makes you feel and look awful, at least from your perspective. And like for real, you’re bleeding!!??! If we cut our finger and bleed for like 20 seconds it’s huge, but when girls are on their period it’s no big deal at all. That’s so unfair. I mean, hell no, it’s not funny at all to have cramps like hell for 5 days or more. I would go without it anytime, seriously. I mean, I have to say that I’m currently at the beginning of my week of hell so I’m a little bit overemotional and complicated and I feel like crap and, for me, look like crap (my boss asked me if I’m sick), so yeah, it’s probably not the best time to complain about things, but I’m in the mood for it, so don’t judge.

So yeah, periods are shitty and pure nonsense. Next. The struggle of looking bomb every second of your life. And before any of you come at me, I know things are changing right now, thank god, but still. People think that girls and women have to be pretty. We just have to. And I don’t get it. Sometimes I want to dress up and look good, of course. But then I’m doing it for myself and not for anybody else. But sometimes I also don’t want to care about my looks AT ALL. Today it’s a lot easier for me to walk around without any makeup (at home) and in some chill out clothes. But when I was younger I always thought that I had to look good, all the time. I remember my mum asking me why I was wearing makeup at home. And I didn’t even know. I just felt weird without it. And today I don’t even want to put on makeup when I know that I’ll just be home the whole day. Because putting it on and off is just a huge pain in the ass, let’s be real.

But of course, there are always two sides. Sometimes girl want to be pretty, look pretty, feel pretty. For themselves. But sometimes they don’t. And that’s okay too, isn’t it? I think so. And I hate the pressure that comes from our society. And I HATE posts like “Go swimming at the first date to see the true face.” Like hell no, you don’t even deserve this date. You deserve nothing. Douche.

I know, this is already a pretty long post and I could rant on and on, but I don’t want this to be too much for you, so I’ll just cut down on the next few things. There are other things that kinda piss me off. The fact that there are still gender specific topics and jobs and expectations. Girls can be pretty AND intelligent. Girls can work as much as men and yes, they should earn the same amount of money (can somebody please fix that finally???). And girls can be into the same things as men. That doesn’t make them manly or something. We are girls. And we can wear whatever we want, do whatever we want and we should feel free to live free. As much as every other human should feel like.

So yeah, that’s my rant. Actually, I wanted this to be a funny post thingy, but I think it just turnt into some kind of feminism rant, which is pretty cool too. Please notice that any of the things that I just said can be switched for men too and also for the whole LGBT community. I think that we are all humans, we are all the same and we should all be equally valuable, no matter what we do, who we love, which body we have or where we live. We are all beautiful. Let’s embrace this beauty. Oh and can somebody please stop this girls having a period thing? Because I certainly didn’t sign up for this. Thanks.

I hope you enjoyed this post and if any of you want to talk about anything and everything, feel free to hit me up. And until then, thanks for reading. x