goals

Hola everyone.

Right now, it’s a few minutes after 9 p.m here in Brighton. The sky has long darkened and slowly but surely you can feel the city calm down. I’ve always loved these times. I’ve always been a creature of the night. And I’ve always been a big fan of late night chats. The talks when people suddenly start discussing their own fate, their personality, their deepest desires and strongest fears. Something about the night makes the truth, the sincereness come out and I’ve always loved that and been fascinated by it. And now that I’ve been thinking about what to write as today’s post, I thought such a late night talk would be the perfect fit. So, get into something comfy, grab a tea and let’s get chatting.

You know, since the beginning of 2019 – which we’re still in, actually, right? – I’ve been thinking about the last year, probably as many other people too. Maybe even yourself. For me, 2018 was truly the craziest year of my entire life so far. Without any doubt. I finished my first bachelor’s degree. Started my own music column for the magazine I’m writing for. Worked at a damn huge festival for the very first time (hopefully not the last). Visited Sziget again, thank god. Worked at the biggest music promotion company in my country. Saw Ed twice (can never be enough, though). Saw my love Marty again. Strolled through the streets of Budapest with my mum. Finally saw the one and only Justin Timberlake live (was well over due, trust me). Moved to Brighton to study music journalism at the legendary BIMM (probably the craziest part). Did my very first interview with a musician, that I’m a huge fan of (this right here is the big contestant for the first spot on the list of craziness, next to the move). Had the very same interview published in The Sun (say whatever you want about the paper, it’s a damn huge deal). Read a ton of books and listened to so much more music. Laughed more. Loved more. Lived more. And so much more that I can’t seem to remember now.

And seeing it now, black on white, makes it even more crazy. If anyone would have told me I’d be where I am right now, I would have laughed in their face. But now I’m really here. And now it’s already 2019 and I have no idea what’s going to happen. I can just hope for the best and that my plans will become reality. Maybe, at this time in a year, I’ll be in London, together with Leni. Stuffed into a small but cozy apartment in the middle of the city we’ve always dreamed about and now call our home. It won’t always be the easiest, but we’ll always make it work, I’m sure of that.

I’ve always been someone who gives everything for her dreams. Who fights for them with all her might. I wouldn’t be where I am if I wasn’t that person. And I’m very proud of that. And it’s not just about big dreams. Even the smallest one is important. Just recently I finally edited all the videos I had saved together into a little potpourri of different moments of my life and added one of Tom’s songs to it. Just put a black and white filter over it and there you have your super emotional video. One that I’ve been wanting to make for ages and finally did. And I’m so happy and proud because of it. Or, another example, since 2015 it has always been my big wish to see Marty every year. And since then I’ve been able to stick to it, every single year. Not just because I wanted it that much, but because I also fought for it. The same with seeing Ed live or getting my mum to visit Sziget again, for the whole week this time (yes, seven full on festival days, I can already start mentally preparing myself for the recovery). And I know, I’m literally just talking about music related things right now, but that stuff basically rules my life, so. Or even if it’s just finishing a book and being proud of it. It’s about the small dreams, the small goals and the small fights. Because we can only grow from small ones.

But finally, what I wanna say – no matter how you’re feeling right now, it will get better, trust me. And if you have a dream, go and fight for it. No matter how small or big it is, crazy or normal it might sound. If it means something to you, it deserves to become reality. Please let nobody tell you any different.

And if you need an immediate portion of happiness to feel better, here you go. I’ve been listening to and looking at this little adorable bean while writing this post and my heart is nearly bursting, so I’m pretty sure you could call Tyler a literal happy pill. Such a cutie, I don’t know how Jenna is able to handle him (good for her though, he’s a true gem).

And yeah, I think that’s it for this late night’s talk. I hope I could inspire you a bit with my babbling about music and dreams and I dearly hope that you enjoyed this post. And I also hope that the little bean named Tyler could put a smile on your face. As always, please don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts and comments down below. Start your own late night chat, go on. And besides that, I hope you’re all doing good and wish you a lovely week. And, of course, thanks for reading. x

Hola everyone.

First of all, I wanna say sorry for the certain lack of posts the past two weeks. Somehow I didn’t feel like posting twice a week, mainly because my head was basically stuffed with other things. So, please let me give you a little update.

Right now I’m sitting at home in my apartment in Vienna, listening to Tom Rosenthal and mainly thinking about my life. University in particular, as today was the first day of the new semester. We moved in here again last Friday and I’m feeling pretty happy to be back here again. Last week I wrote my first exam of this semester and next week I’m flying to Amsterdam with my friend for a short holiday trip and to see Martin Garrix at the Amsterdam Dance Event. And I can’t wait, seriously. God, I’m so excited.

But apart from all that, university has basically been my main concern right now. And that brings me to this one special topic I want to talk about today. Which is goals. And no, I don’t mean relationship, friendship or boyfriend goals. I mean the basic life goals we all have and struggle with. And I know how you’re all feeling, because the future is scaring the hell out of me right now and also, at the same time, putting the biggest grin on my face.

As some of you may know I’m planning to move to London to do my Master there. And this one stupid, little, idiotic thing called Brexit has basically put one huge stone in my way, which I’m trying to crawl over right now. So, in order to not have to pay like 20.000 € for university, I’m planning on finishing my Bachelor next summer. That would enable me to go to London next autumn, before the Brexit. Good plan so far, I know. But it will be hard. I know, I’m probably talking about daily hassles and small nothings here, but it seems like university doesn’t really want me to finish this early. But I will try my best anyway.

So, this is a huge goal of mine. To try my absolute best, work hard and finish my Bachelor next summer to be able to go to London without any more difficulties. And that really, really means a lot to me. It’s like one of my biggest dreams to live and study in London.

But you know, at some moments when I sit in front of my laptop and plan my semester and think about ways I could do more and better, I take a deep breath, relax and quickly think about all the goals in my life I have already achieved and all the dreams I made true. And I think that’s really something important to do. Because sometimes I talk to different people or look at young people with amazing careers and get the feeling that I’m basically a huge loser, but that’s not true. Not at all. Because I simply know that I have already achieved and done so many things I never thought I would do. And not even at this young age. I mean, I’m 21 years old, acing my Bachelor right now (yes, I do get good grades), already lived in Berlin on my own, wrote and published my own book and am working as a journalist since March this year. I mean, how crazy is that? And I’ve done, seen and achieved so much more. I really have to tell myself all those things over and over again every few times, just to remind myself to be proud of myself. And that’s so freaking important. To be proud of yourself and happy with who you are and what you’ve done and what you’re doing. You should all try it out, it will probably baffle you all, because you’ll notice something great – we are all amazing people, trying to do their best in this crazy thing we call our world. And that’s awesome.

I know, I have huge ass goals on my list and crazy plans for my life, but sometimes it’s really nice to look back at my own life path. Because it really makes me happy. I know I’m literally the biggest perfectionist who always pushes herself, but you know what? I try my freaking best everyday and it’s pretty perfect the way it is right now. And I’m great the way I am. I wouldn’t change a thing. And I really hope that you guys think the same of yourself, because you should and you owe it to yourself. Treat yourself. And stop comparing your life with others. You are you, they are them and everyone can be struggling sometimes. You’re all doing amazing, please never forget that.

So yeah guys, that’s my little update and post about all the thoughts that have been swirling around my head for a long time and something I find is really important. I hope you enjoyed it and that it maybe made you think a little. Please don’t hesitate to leave your thoughts down below. And until then I wish you all an amazing week and, as always, thanks for reading. x

Tag: goals

A Late Night Talk